Wednesday, January 11, 2006

Essay 334


Damn, it’s another MultiCultClassics Monologue…

• A new study showed over 7% of American workers are drinking on the job. Damn, wonder how many of the researchers were soused during the data gathering.

• Pat Robertson has been banned from Israel for his suggestion that Prime Minister Ariel Sharon’s stroke was divine punishment from God. Banned? Damn, why didn’t Jesse Jackson think of that first?

• California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger is an illegal immigrant. At least when it comes to riding motorcycles. California cops say Schwarzenegger does not have the proper credentials on his driver’s license to ride a hog. This was discovered after he recently crashed his bike into a car. “I just never really applied for [the proper license],” Schwarzenegger admitted. “It was just one of those things that I never really did.” Damn, maybe he actually is an illegal immigrant too.

• “Music With A Twist” —the new record label launched by SonyBMG and Wilderness Media & Entertainment — will focus on gay and lesbian artists. Damn, somebody call the Village People pronto.

• There’s nothing gay about the sex video starring Colin Farrell and a Playboy Playmate that hit the Internet. Damn, let’s hope it’s better than most of Farrell’s recent films.

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